The Question I Get Asked the Most Abroad (and Why It’s Complicated)

“Where are you from?”It sounds like small talk, but it never is.

Yesterday was Reunification Day in Vietnam — my home country. Back there, it’s a national holiday. Families gather, streets are alive with flags, and this year, there was even a drone show lighting up the night sky.

Meanwhile here in the UK? Just another Wednesday. One where I was nervously waiting for a job interview, rehearsing my best “hire-me” smile.

When they asked where I’m from, I didn’t flinch: “Vietnam.” I said it proudly, like it carried its own drumbeat. I even tossed in a history fact (because apparently, I can’t resist being the unofficial cultural ambassador) and yes, I mentioned the drone show too.

But pride is funny, isn’t it? When people talk about it, they often picture waving flags, marching bands, parades, fireworks. Pride that’s loud and impossible to miss. For me, it’s quieter, but it lingers.

Sometimes, pride is standing in a tiny studio kitchen, stirring a pot of pho at midnight because it smells like home. Or correcting someone (with a smile, always) when they assume Vietnam is all rice paddies and buffaloes, and gently reminding them that yes, we have skyscrapers, high-speed internet, and some of the best coffee in the world.

And then, inevitably, comes the follow-up question:“If Vietnam’s so great, why are you here in the UK?”

Well… that’s not easy to explain. Life choices, opportunities, a bit of chance, a bit of restlessness, it’s never just one reason. But being here doesn’t make me any less Vietnamese. If anything, it makes me more deliberate about carrying that pride with me.

Living abroad comes with FOMO. Watching the celebrations online hurts a little, like being homesick for a party you weren’t invited to. But I’ve realised honouring Vietnam doesn’t have to be loud. It’s in the everyday moments: showing up, being kind, doing work that matters. Carrying that quiet pride into every room I enter, even if it’s just a meeting in Nottingham on a random Wednesday.

Because maybe national pride isn’t about the parades we miss — it’s about the stories we tell, the food we share, and the little ways we carry home with us.

And so I wondered maybe pride isn’t something you wave. Maybe it’s something you live.